Top 12 Valentine Songs For Singles
February 13, 2012

With February 14th upon us, any single person will tell you. Valentine's Day sucks! All those couples out there are all “I love you”. “No, I love you more” Tra la la la la. Meanwhile, single people are home watching Family Guy reruns. Okay, I'm really not that bitter, or that miserable. But, instead of a dozen roses, here's a Top Twelve list of Valentine's Day songs for single people. I have all of these songs in my collection, so I am quite familiar with them. If you want the drama of the countdown, scroll down slowly. Enjoy!...

#12 The Breakup Song—Greg Kihn Band (1981): This song is selected more for its title than its lyrics, but it is still a cool song to sing along to. They don't write 'em like that anymore...

We had broken up for good just an hour before. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
And now I'm staring at the bodies as they're dancing 'cross the floor. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
And then the band slowed the tempo, and the music gets you down. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
It was the same old song, with a melancholy sound. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
They don't write 'em like that anymore. They just don't write 'em like that anymore.

#11 Love Hurts—Nazareth (1976): Some people may actually want to be miserable on Valentine's Day. If you'd like to spend your day crying in your beer and pretzels or your wine and cheese, I recommend this old standard...

Some fools think of happiness, blissfulness, togetherness
Some fools fool themselves I guess. They're not foolin' me!
I know it isn't true. I know it isn't true. Love is just a lie, made to make you blue.
Love hurts. Ooh ooh love hurts. Ooh, ooh love hurts.

#10 Somebody—DePeche Mode (1984): One more downer, then we'll try to pick things up. This song is kind of like Valentine's Day itself, terrific if you are with someone, and could make you disconsolate if you are alone. DePeche Mode was not really known for uplifting hymns anyway, but one of the all-time great bands. If you're not familiar with this one, no guitars here, just Martin Gore and a piano...

I want somebody to share, share the rest of my life, share my innermost thoughts, know my intimate details.
Someone who'll stand by my side, and give me support, and in return, she'll get my support.
She will listen to me when I want to speak, about the world we live in, and life in general.
Though my views may be wrong, they may even be perverted, she'll hear me out, and won't easily be converted
To my way of thinking, in fact she'll often disagree, but at the end of it all, she will understand me.

Gore does go on to say “Things like this make me sick”, so maybe he was messing with us, or perhaps he doesn't really enjoy Valentine's Day either.

#9 She Got the Gold Mine (I Got the Shaft)—Jerry Reed (1982): You know there are a ton of country songs out there that could fit this category, but this is the best one I know. It really is more of a song for divorced men, but I think single people can feel his pain. If you are old enough, you may remember Reed as “Snowman” from Smokey and the Bandit. He also hosted a variety show in the 1970s. Reed died in 2008 at the age of 71...

I'm tellin' you they have made a mistake, 'cause it adds up to more than this cowboy makes.
Besides everything I ever had worth taking they already took.
While she's living like a queen on alimony, I'm working two shifts, eating baloney,
asking myself “Why didn't you just learn how to cook?”

She got the gold mine, I got the shaft. They said they're splitting it all down the middle, then they give her the better half.
Well it all sounds kinda funny, but it hurts too much to laugh. She got the gold mine, I got the shaft.

#8 I Hate Myself For Loving You—Joan Jett and the Blackhearts (1988): The first of two women on the list. She's in a relationship but he cheats. Still, she loves him anyway. I think this song works for both sexes. Sunday Night Football fans will know the tune. The title was changed to "Waiting All Day for Sunday Night", and sung by Faith Hill to open the NBC telecasts...

Midnight. Gettin' uptight. Where are you? You said you'd meet me, now it's quarter to two.
I know I'm hangin' but I'm still wanting you.
Hey Jack. It's a fact. They're talkin' in town. I turned my back and you're messin' around.
I'm not being jealous. Don't like lookin' like a clown.
I think of you, every night and day. You broke my heart, then you took my pride away.

I hate myself for loving you. Can't break free from the things that you do.
I wanna walk, but I run back to you. That's why I hate myself for loving you.

#7 Whats My Age Again?—Blink 182 (1999): A song about a really immature guy who can't figure out why he keeps getting dumped. You'd much rather laugh at him than think about your own troubles...

I took her out. It was a Friday night. I wore cologne to get the feeling right.
We started making out, and she took off my pants, but then I turned on the TV.
And that's about the time she walked away from me. Nobody likes you when you're 23
And are still more amused by TV shows. What the hell is ADD?
My friends say I should act my age. What's my age again? What's my age again?

#6 Self Esteem—Offspring (1994): Well at least this guy is in a relationship, but it certainly doesn't seem to be a very good one...

Now I'll relate this little bit, happens more than I'd like to admit.
Late at night, she knocks on my door, she's drunk again and looking to score.
I know, I should say no, but it's kinda hard when she's ready to go.
I may be dumb, but I'm not a dweeb. I'm just a sucker with no self esteem.

When she's saying, oh, that she wants only me, then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends.
When she's saying, oh, that I'm like a disease, then I wonder how much more I can spend.
Well I guess I should stick up for myself but I really think it's better this way.
The more you suffer, the more it shows you really care. Right? Yeah-eh-eh.

#5 I Can Do Better—Avril Lavigne (2007): Lavigne seems to do a lot of man bashing in her songs, but this is a good one, and guys don't even need to amend the words to enjoy it too...

I couldn't give a damn what you say to me. I don't really care what you think of me.
'Cause either way you're gonna think what you believe. There's nothing you could say that would hurt me.
I'm better off without you anyway. I thought it would be hard but I'm okay.
I don't need you if you're gonna be that way. 'Cause with me it's all or nothing.
I'm sick of this shit. Don't deny. You're a waste of time. I'm sick of this shit. Don't ask why.

I hate, you now, so go, away from me. You're gone. So long. I can do better. I can do better.
Hey. Hey you. I found, myself again. That's why, you're gone. I can do better. I can do better.

#4 One More Minute—Weird Al Yankovic (1985): Before he was writing parodies about food or pop culture, you could tell Weird Al was not a ladies man in school. I'm a huge Weird Al fan. His parodies are great, but he has some pretty good original songs too...

I guess I might seem kinda bitter. You've got me feeling down in the dumps.
'Cause I'm stranded all alone in the gas station of love, and I have to use the self-service pumps.
Oh, so, honey, let me help you with that suitcase. You ain't gonna break my heart in two.
'Cause I'd rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face, than spend one more minute with you.

#3 You Don't Love Me Anymore—Weird Al Yankovic (1992): If I ever learn to play the guitar, I want to learn this song first...

I knew that we were having problems when, you put those piranhas in my bathtub again.
You're still the light of my life. Oh darlin' I'm beggin', won't you put down that knife.
You know I, even think it's kinda cute the way, you poison my coffee just a little each day.
I still remember the way that you laughed, when you pushed me down the elevator shaft.
Oh if you don't mind me asking “What's this poisonous cobra doing in my underwear drawer?”
Sometimes I get to thinkin', you don't love me anymore.

#2 She Hates Me—Puddle of Mudd (2002): If you are in relationship hell, the best therapy you can get is to get in your car, get out on the highway, crank this song up as loud as you can, and scream it at the top of your lungs. Warning: Use the expletive at your own discretion...

Met a girl, thought she was grand. Fell in love, found out first hand.
Went well for a week or two. Then it all came unglued.
In a trap, trip I can't get grip. Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip.
Now I'm starting to realize, I was living one big lie.
She fucking hates me. Trust. She fucking hates me. La la la la.
I tried too hard and she tore my feelings like I had none, and ripped them away.

And the number one Valentine song for singles...

#1 Love Stinks—J. Geils Band (1980): This is simply a classic. You may also remember Adam Sandler's much angrier version from The Wedding Singer in 1998. Same thing, sing this one loud!...

You love her, but she loves him, and he loves somebody else. You just can't win.
And so it goes until the day you die. This thing they call love. It's gonna make you cry.
I've had the blues, the reds, and the pinks. One thing for sure. Love stinks!

Love stinks, yeah yeah, (love stinks). Love stinks, yeah yeah, (love stinks).
Love stinks, yeah yeah, (love stinks). Love stinks, yeah yeah.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone (with love)!!!

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